Self portrait in Brooklyn, October 2014
Actually love how this turned out!
Greenwich Village this morning
I love every single photo I have ever seen of this girl.
Erin at Bryant Park Library, October 2014
Felix & Erin.
being with you is like daydreaming.
i notice that in almost every selfie with you, my head leans slightly into you, it tilts to fit right into your cuddle. it reminds me of how i feel so comfortable by you, how i love being close to you. and it looks exactly how i feel inside by the way i am with you in these pictures.
when you’re with me, you’re like a living pillow, always there for me to rest my head on, for me lean on. when you’re not physically here, i still feel confident that i can lean on you, rely on you, and trust you that i can just be me with you. so even when i’m far away, i feel close to you because of who you are to me. and when you’re physically with me, my body expresses that mental comfort that i have with you. as i nestle my head snugly between the grove of your neck and shoulder when i’m sitting alongside you, or rest my head upon your chest when i’m standing next to or hugging you, however the shape, in every photo, i love that i can physically trace the story of what you mean to me by how close i am to you. “close” in both the mental and physical sense, and both completely.
our pictures are not just pictures of you and me, not just pictures of “a couple.” to me, these selfies are moments showing how you’re with me and how i’m with you. i look at these pictures and i can see how comfortable you make me, how you are a pillow for my daydreams. with you, everywhere is a safe space for daydreaming, everything is alright. i can simply rest beside you, any time, any where, always.
this comfort i have with you is like the feeling i get after i’ve been running around to class and to work while freaking out all day and all week about life, too busy i had to miss meals, and i’m probably on my annoying period and have a paper to write for the next day. BUT THEN i finally lie on my bed and i slowly sink and breathe, just soaking in how happy i am to be home. to be with you is that singular feeling of being home. that feeling of comfort. except it’s not just for a temporary second. it’s not just when i’m lying on my bed. your existence is that comfort to me, perpetually. like a pillow, you’re a metaphor of everything being at rest, at peace, and so i just sink and lean into you.
every day, when i reflect on you and what you mean to me, i remember how you’re a dream that i never i could dream. and yet you’re real. i see you in my selfies. i see us in our selfies. i see how much i love you in these moments. you’re my perpetual pillow, my place of rest, my embrace of comfort. and i can only believe that being with you is heaven on earth.
Isabelle lookin like Juliet at the New York Public Library in Bryant Park